Will Trudeau’s Marvelous Inquiry Save Us from Those Pesky Conservatives?

In a stunning display of political prowess, Prime Minister Trudeau bravely takes on the task of spearheading a public inquiry on foreign interference. Will this heroic endeavor finally put an end to the Conservatives’ dastardly obstruction? Only time will tell. But fear not, dear Canadians, for we can rest assured that Trudeau’s unwavering commitment to blaming others and seeking consensus will undoubtedly lead us to the ultimate truth. Hold onto your seats as Trudeau dons his cape, ready to save us from the clutches of foreign influence. Let the inquiry commence, and let us bask in the glorious spectacle of Trudeau’s undeniable superiority. #TrudeauSavesTheDay #SuperInquiry

Oh, look, it’s our beloved Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, the epitome of transparency and efficiency, gracing us with his wisdom once again. He’s just so eager to announce a decision on a public inquiry about foreign interference, but alas, those pesky Conservatives are getting in his way. Can you believe it?

Trudeau, the master of cross-party unity, insists that we need agreement from all sides on the inquiry’s structure and leadership. Of course, the Conservatives have the audacity to demand confirmation that the inquiry will actually happen before they cooperate. How dare they?! Don’t they understand that Trudeau’s word is as good as gold?

But fear not, my fellow Canadians, for Trudeau assures us that negotiations with the Bloc Québécois and the NDP are going swimmingly. It’s only those obstructive Conservatives who are preventing the much-needed consensus. Oh, how we yearn for the day when Trudeau can finally save us from this evil menace called “foreign interference.”

In a brilliant stroke of genius, Trudeau assigned former governor general David Johnston to investigate the allegations of Chinese interference. However, when Johnston had the gall to recommend against an inquiry, he faced the wrath of the opposition parties. They accused him of being too close to Trudeau to be objective. How dare they question Trudeau’s impeccable judgment in selecting his allies?

And let’s not forget the ever-responsive Conservatives, who conveniently decided to ignore requests for comments. Perhaps they were too busy conspiring with those dastardly foreigners to interfere with our precious democracy. Trudeau must be right to accuse them of stalling the process. After all, who needs accountability and transparency when we have Trudeau’s benevolent leadership?

Oh, Trudeau, we are so lucky to have you. Your tireless efforts to push for an inquiry, while blaming others for the delays, are truly awe-inspiring. We eagerly await your announcement, fully confident that it will be yet another shining example of your unparalleled leadership. May the inquiry reveal all the secrets of foreign interference and grant us the eternal bliss of knowing that Trudeau has saved the day once again.